Being based in DC and having the unique privilege of serving as the grooming outlet for many gov’t big wigs, it would certainly make sense for us to have a blowout shindig at our Capitol-based store for this month’s inauguration. You know, streamers, bands, bad dancing, shaves, etc. Problem is, despite the great excitement , there is a big and unfortunate down side. You see, for reasons reflective of the onslaught of humanity descending upon our fair city and the mega security that goes with such, we’re going to have to close inauguration day — and probably a bit early the day before. There will simply be no way to get around as streets and garages in our zone are closed and our store is smack in the middle of a designated “event bus parking” zone. Hooray for loss of business!
So, being the patriotic bunch we are, we decided that even though we can’t have a party, there are some things we can do to honor this important event and what it represents. In that vain, below please find two legit and one goof promotion we’re planning. We’ll let you know which is which soon.
- The Oba-massage: Starting the 16th through the end of the month, we’ll pay tribute to our soon-to-be leader by offering a massage therapy session themed to his personality and campaign. Said massage will be specially priced (so as to stimulate the economy), will focus on wrists and hands (for Blackberry-obsessed folks like Mr. Obama) and will feature eco-friendly massage creams (reduce, recycle, blah, blah).
- The “Morning After The Ball” Hangover Package: Good music, bad dancing, tons of schmoozing and tons of boozing can lead to a very sad guy come the day after an inaugural ball. Our DC outlet will help by offering a set of services including limo pick up, an Oba-massage and facial (to wake him up), a Bloody Mary, two aspirin and a bucket if needed.
- Ball Powder: Nobody wants to be in the presence of uncomfortable Inauguration “balls.” Use of this product can ensure all inauguration balls are as comfortable and fun as possible.
Thanks for listening.